Meri Maa

Maa… Aaj bhi woh kursi khaali hai, Jahan aap har shaam mere intezaar mein baithi rehti thi. Ki mera beta ayega,use paneer Pasand hai ,aur ye Aam ka achar bade chaav se khata hai …ayega to pehle thodi daant khayega phir apni ma ke hath se bana khana khayega phir ma bete thodi der sair karte karte din bhar ki khatti meethi baatein kar lenge …lekin… Main aata nahi tha,Main apka banaya khana khata nahi tha … Aur aap phir bhi… har din, har shaam, Usi jagah pe… Jaise kisi umeed ka diya jala ke rakhti thi jise apne jeete jee bujhne nahi diya… Ma …Main aksar sochta hoon, Kya itna mushkil tha mera 5 minute apke paas baith jaana,Kuchh waqt ke liye dosti yaari parties aur duniyadari ko bhool jana ? Lekin nahi… main to busy tha. Kaam mein, duniya mein, apne mobile mein…pizza aur parties me Aap kehti thi aur kitne din hai teri Ma … beta mujhe neend nahi AATI teri awaz sune bina… kam se kam phone to utha liya kar ….wo kya kehte hain … haan voice note hi bhej Diya kar … Aur main? Main gussa kar deta tha… Bina soche, bina samjhe. Yaad hai maa, Jab aap bukhar mein bhi subah uth kar tiffin banati thi… Aur main bina khaye nikal jata tha. Aapke haathon ka paratha… Aaj duniya ke kisi chef ke haath ka khaana bhi us jaisa nahi lagta. Aap raat bhar jagti thi jab mujhe der ho jaati thi… Aur main laut ke kehta tha, “Maa, please mujhe space chahiye.” Space chahiye tha mujhe… Aaj poori duniya bhar ka space mil gaya hai, Par maa…ye khamoshi kaatne ko daudti hai … rone ka man karta hai Par …. Par Ma tu nahi hai na … jiske gale lagke sukoon mil jata tha par samajh nahi pata tha main un ghalatiyon ko jo ghalati se ho jaya karti thi mujhse… Ma main bada ho Raha hu aur thoda samajhdar bhi …Haan us waqt utna nahi soch paya tha main … Mujhe lagta tha… Maa toh hamesha rehti hai, Kya chala jaayega agar thoda ignore kar diya… Lekin maa, Aap chali gayi. Aakhri din… Main phone pe busy tha, Aap ne dekha… Main aankh milane se bhi bach Raha tha, Aap kuch kehna chahti thi shayad… Lekin main sun nahi paaya…ya sun na nahi chah Raha tha … Aur aap… Kabhi kuch kehne ke liye bachi hi nahi maa. Aaj main sab kuch kar sakta hoon, Lekin aapko lauta kar wapas la nahi sakta. Main har us ladke ko kehna chahta hoon… Jiski maa zinda hai— Bhai, kuch nahi chahiye maa ko. Sirf waqt chahiye thoda sa Ek “Maa, I love you” chahiye. Aur agar yeh bhi nahi de sakte, Toh kal ko mat rona… Kyuki fir sirf guilt reh jaata hai… maa nahi