MERA APNA SHAHRUKH KHAN

Kehte hain na... pehli mohabbat koi nahi bhoolta. Main bhi nahi bhooli. Uske begair jitna bhi safar beeta hai mera, uski fikr, uska zikr hamesha mere dil ke ek kone mein uljhan bankar mandrata raha hai. Main chaah kar bhi use apne dil se nikaal nahi paayi. Main apne bistar par leti hui usi ke khayalon mein thi. Achanak mere phone par ek notification aaya. Screen par nazar padte hi meri dhadkane tez ho gayi. Sajid ki Facebook friend request thi. Maine turant uski profile par click karke uski saari posts ko jee bhar ke dekha. Uski har ek post kuch na kuch keh rahi thi. Uske shabdon mein mera bhi zikr tha, bina mera naam liye! Mujhe laga wo mujhe bhool chuka hoga. Main aaj bhi uske liye itni aham hoon, uski saari posts se pata chala. Main bahut royi. Main khuda se yahi minnat karne lagi "Ae khuda, jo zindagi ka hissa na bane, use kabhi kisi ke dil ke kareeb na lana." Bina friend request accept kiye, maine phone ko takiye ke neeche rakh diya. Mere aansu nahi ruk rahe the. Main beete dinon ke khayalon mein khoyi hui thi, ki meri 5 saal ki beti Saira mere paas aake poochhti hai... "Ammi, aap ro kyun rahi hain? Abbu ki yaad aa rahi hai?" Maine pyaar se usse kaha, "Nahi beta, tum so jao. Aur Rahil ko mat jagana, nahi toh tang karega." Saira chupchaap Rahil ke bagal mein so gayi. Aur main apne woh suhaane pal yaad karne lagi, jo kabhi laut kar nahi aayenge. Woh college ke din, sakhiyaan, saheliyaan, mauj, masti, nukkad wali chai, Naeem chacha ki ice cream, Barkhu uncle ke golgappe. Juniors ko tang karna, teachers ki daant, unki nakal karna. Ye sab sochkar, naam aankhon se main hans padi. Apni class ki sabse honhaar ladki thi main, aur khoobsurat bhi. Friends kahti thi "Mehrunisa, tu hamare group ki Aishwarya hai!" Ladke bhi comment kiya karte the "Khuda ne bade fursat se tarasha hoga aisi dream girl ko!" Comment sunkar thoda gussa toh aata tha, lekin achha bhi lagta tha. Lekin ek ladke ne kabhi comment nahi kiya wo tha Sajid. Uski body language, uski aankhen kuch aur hi kehti thi. Mujhe pata tha, Sajid mujhe pasand karta hai. Woh normal sa, seedha-saadha ladka tha. Aksar woh kurte-pyjame mein hi dikhta tha. Kai baar usne koshish ki mujhse baat karne ki, lekin maine kabhi use bhaav nahi diya. Woh mujhe roz dekhta, muskurata, aur mere nazarandaz karne par udaas hokar chala jaata. 20–22 saal ki umar rahi hogi uski, aur main 16 paar kar chuki thi. Jawani ki pehli seedhi main chadh chuki thi. Ek saathi ka ehsaas mujhe bhi hone laga tha. Lekin main ek aise parivaar se thi, jahan pyaar, mohabbat, ishq, filmi gaane, mobile phones, yaari-dosti, khaaskar ladkon se... kuch bhi allowed nahi tha. Mere Abbu masjid ke Maulana the. Unhi ki azaan se hamari subah hoti thi. Unki kahi baatein hum chaar bhai-behno ke liye paththar ki lakeer thi. Abbu hamesha samjhate the “Hamari aabroo hi hamari daulat hai, hamari izzat hai. Sir utha ke jeene ki wajah hai aabroo. Aabroo hai toh khandaan hai. Bachcho, kabhi is Maulana ka sir jhukne mat dena.” Yahi khayalat mere mann ko Sajid ke taraf jaane se rok dete the. Maine thaan liya tha—shaadi se pehle zindagi mein kisi mard ko paas aane ki ijaazat nahi doongi. Ek din main college se ghar aa rahi thi. Raste mein Sajid khada tha. Meri nazar padi toh mere kadmon ki raftaar dheemi ho gayi. Uske haath mein gulab ka poora guchcha tha. Woh ek tak mujhe dekh raha tha. Maine nazrein jhukai aur tez kadmon se aage badh gayi. Usne awaaz lagayi “Mehrunisa!” Main aur tez jaane lagi. Usne phir awaaz lagayi “Aakhri baar meri baat sun lo!” Main ruk gayi, isliye ki usne “aakhri baar” kyun kaha? Maine mudkar usko dekha. Woh mere paas aane laga. Main kabhi use dekh rahi thi, toh kabhi gulab ke guldaste ko. Jaise-jaise woh paas aa raha tha, meri saansein tez ho rahi thi. Dar bhi lag raha tha, kahin koi dekh na le! Woh bilkul mere kareeb aake khada ho gaya. Woh kuch bol pata, uske pehle hi maine puchh liya "Kya hua? Kya baat karni hai? Dekho, mujhe yeh sab pasand nahi hai!" Sajid ne dheere se jawab diya "Maine kaha na... aakhri baar disturb kar raha hoon. Khuda kasam, phir kabhi nahi dikhunga tumhein." Itna kehte hi uska gala rundh gaya. Uski aankhen bheeg gayi. Pehli baar Sajid ne mujhe raste mein roka tha. Pehli baar uski zubaan se apna naam suna tha. Pehli baar main kisi ladke ke itne kareeb khadi thi, woh bhi is tarah. Uski baatein, uske aansu... Mujhe bechain kar rahe the. Mera dil ghabra raha tha. Phir usne jo kaha, mere hosh ud gaye... Sajid ne aisa kya kaha? Sajid ke haath mein gulab ka guldasta kyun tha? Kya sach mein Sajid Mehrunisa se kabhi nahi milega? Padhiye agla bhaag... Part 2